Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Couch Surfing

 My bicycle forgets I am alive, since he hasn't seen me in over a whole year.  I am not in shape enough physically or mentally to challenge myself with exertion of any kind.  Panting for breath, breaking out in a drenching sweat, risking life and limb searching for endorphins is just not me.    Let's face it:  menopause gives me all that and more--I am no athlete and I have given up trying to convince anybody any different. 

These days, it's all I can do to avoid the world of sports.  It's everywhere.  No matter where I turn, there are the soccer fans in their Orange jerseys, flying their Orange flags and bursting into cheers when they meet each other. 

The World Cup. 

How long does it go on? 
I did send congratulations west when my granddaughter scored her first goal in the pee wee version of the game.  I did wave when fans flew past me in their speeding vehicle covered in flags of several persuasions.   I tried to keep out of the line of fire when BBQ'ers fielded a ball in my direction. 

Yes, I think that about covers it.

Well, it's the first week of July and that means:

 The Tour de France. 

Running from Saturday July 3rd to Sunday July 25th 2010, the 97th Tour de France is made up of 1 prologue and 20 stages and will cover a total distance of 3,642 kilometres.  The second stage was the bloodiest so far, with more injuries and drop outs than usual so early on.  Breakfast doesn't start here until the recap of last night's events has been digested.   Continual updates are reported over the in-house intercom throughout the day.  Supper is taken on trays in front of the TV. My life has become one long avoidance technique, attempting to escape the inevitable fanaticism of the sporting wannabees I live with.   It's going to be a LONG HAUL.

I am keeping busy watering my new grass and gardens, attempting to get ahead of the 100+ degree temperatures outside which are determined to kill off all vegetation in my yard.  I've also got a good book on the go and a quilt that needs finishing.  Life goes on.  When all else fails, I excel in couch surfing.  I am an all time pro at rest and relaxation.  If any of you need tips on the finer points of the easy life, just call on me.  Until the world of sports takes a vacation (read: there's something worth watching on TV), you will find me hiding away, keeping cool, resting on the couch.

Until next time, I remain yours ever truly,
The Couch Surfer


Unknown said...

I'd like to do a bit more couch surfing... sounds like you've got it made!

Jennifer Farris said...

I'm a BIG fan of air-conditioning, myself. Would take a couch over humidity-soaked outdoor heat any day! ;)


Anonymous said...

Yeah, I used to be tops in that sport so we opted to not have tv. Works awesome, the only known cure.

Marice said...

I am with you on couch surfing ;) good thing I am not so much into those sports too :)

Boomer Pie. said...

Are you couch surfing on your boat or in the house? With this heat, I'd think you'd be out on the Steadfast...cruising in those cool Maine waters. The coastline up there is so pretty this time of year.

Menopausal New Mom said...

Couch surfing!! I haven't been able to do that since my daughter was born 4 years ago! I happen to have a hubby who is glued to the TV when it comes to soccer and sports, drives me crazy some days, how I would love to get lost in any book that didn't have Sesame Street on the cover :)

Unknown said...

Mom your hilarious- commenting on the one above as well-- and hey, you don't seem that outofshape to me!